Body Respect

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You all know that I have been (in vain) trying to loose weight and stuck at the same weight since June of 09. It's frustrating. I've tried everything. And I'm stuck. Simply stuck.

I subscribe to two fitness magazines. I received my Shape mag yesterday and read an article that has changed me.

I stopped fighting myself and became more forgiving of my body.

This quote is from Katharine McPhee. Now most of the time I could care less what celebrities have to say about whatever. I know they are real people with real thoughts, but their fantasy world effects those real thoughts. But this has value.

I have been berating and bemoaning my body for years. It's time to stop. I need to do just as she said, stop fighting and start forgiving my body. It's done so much for me. It has shed 120 lbs, it has grown two beautiful, healthy babies. It does work out and move on a regular basis. It is healthy, it is beautiful, it is strong. And (since we are near the time of Roe v Wade) it was fashioned by God's hands to do His will. Maybe it doesn't look exactly what I want it to look like, but that's ok. (this is the weird part) Body I forgive you. It's ok. Let's work together to be healthy, in mind, in spirit and in body.  I'll do my part to give you what you need, so that you can do what I need.  Thanks for everything. 

Just a Job

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I haven't posted much, sorry. Haven't had much to say. I've been thinking on some things, though. Mainly struggling with the whole stay-at-home-mom thing. Did you know I have a bachelor's degree? Yup, paid for too. (Thanks Mom and Dad!) And I feel like I don't use a lick of it. One doesn't need a degree to raise kids. But...

Ok, I'm just gonna free-write (you know in creative writing, you just write what comes....) I'm just gonna lay it out. I feel like a looser. I feel like what I do no one sees or cares about. I feel unimportant. I feel like no one listens and I feel like I have nothing of worth to contribute. Look at what I write about on this blog!? It's about sewing, diapering, cleaning. Who cares about those things? I don't get a bi-weekly pat on the back (paycheck, hello!) saying I've done at least a satisfactory job. I have 24/7 duty call, more, more, more.

I am struggling to know that my time spent is worthwhile. And I know it is! I know it. I mean, I know it in my head, but my heart doesn't believe it. I wonder if when sahm's were the norm if those women had trouble with it.

And I feel alone. So alone. I know the Lord is working on me in these areas. Trying to get me to rely on Him. I know that. But it's still hard. Even Jesus, in His darkest hour wanted his three closest disciples to be near to him in the garden. He needed to know someone had his back. My dearest friend is 4 hours away. And she's back to work, dealing with family issues, plus she has a new baby.

Please understand I am not complaining, I wouldn't want anyone else to raise my kids. I just need a brain change. But I don't' know how to do it.

Does anyone care?

Watch Out Vera!

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Ok, so as if finishing the quilt and pillows and shams wasn't enough, I made something else. I'm quite proud of this one. Actually, I LOVE it. Totally without a pattern or instructions. Well, mostly, I had a template for the flower.

My Sunshine Bag!  I crave the color yellow in the winter, I think because of the lack of sun.  I was thinking about making a lap quilt, but then saw tutorial about making a quilted tote.  I kinda ran with the idea and made my own.

Here is a close up of the quilting.  The area around the flower is known as stippling.  I did that on the back too.

 

The button closure and binding.

This is what the back looks like.  It's actually a big mistake.  I had tried to do one thing and found out that measuring accurately is very important.  But I didn't want to throw away all that fabric, so I went with it.  I think it looks neat!

A close up of the back quilting.

This is how I did the sides.  That is one continuous strip under the bottom and through to the other side.  I stitched in the ditch for the quilting here.  You can also see the strap.  I wanted something shorter than most tote bags offer.

Here shows the finishing I did on the outside seams.  It's called a french seam, wherein the raw edges are enclosed.  It gives the bag stability and durability.  It also makes the bag look nicer.  I did a basic liner for the inside.  Nothing fancy, that's why I have no pics of it.  I really like this bag and intend on using it for a long time!  Now I need a makeup bag for the inside.  Hmmmm.  Got to start thinking of that. 

What do you think?

My Quilt...Again!!!

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My quilt is finally finished and while I realize most of you have seen these pics on facebook, I thought I'd post some here just for posterity sake. Lets see if I can do pictures again without pulling my hair out....

This is a pic of the binding, border and the quilt back.  A lady at my church gave me that material.  I think it is beautiful.

One last look.  Those two pillows on your left are reversible and the flange on the center pillow is leftover material from the back.  I tried to use ever last bit of squares or patches on this thing.  Unfortunately I still have leftovers.  And I was trying to pare down my stash.  I think I've only succeeded in making it bigger than before.  I am planning on another quilt.  A totally scrappy, erratic pattern.  I want it to go together quickly.  I'll keep you updated.  

Let me know what you think!

(By the way, the pics went up much easier by just doing one at a time, rather than a whole bunch)

Happy Anniversary!!

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I know this is a day late, but Happy Anniversary to my dearest hubby! Here are a few pics from that beautiful day seven years ago.

By the way, if anyone knows how to more easily put pictures into blogger, please let me know.  I had such a time even getting these to stay put!

My Quilt!!!

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It's not done, not by any expanse of the mind, but it is so close!! I had to post some pics. I am so proud of this. I can't wait till it's done and on the bed.

 The quilt from the left.

 The quilt from the right.

 A favorite block.  I love the contrast of black and pink.  Who would've known those two colors would go together so well?

 Another favorite.  Andrew's favorite too.

 I love this one.  I love the green. 

I'll keep you updated as things progress! 

Christmas Greetings!

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This is our Christmas letter we sent out this year, along with the picture too. Enjoy!

Greetings Family and Friends!
It hardly seems that the time is upon us when we celebrate our Saviors birth. I am reminded yet again how easily it is to fall into a season of busy-ness, rather than a season of celebration, worship and gratitude. But the Lord is patient as he waits for us to return, as he has been for over 2000 years. All he asks is that we be still and know that He is God.
We have witnessed the hand of the Lord in so many ways this year. It's been a full, blessed year. Please allow me to share how the Lord has blessed.
We started off the year bittersweet. It's often said that when one soul leaves this earth, another comes to take it's place. We saw that with the passing of Andrew's grandmother and the birth of my first nephew. We traveled to visit with Andrew's Mother's family and to say goodbye to Mom-mom. I never got the chance to get to know her, but she was witnessed as a strong, active woman. Strong in the Lord and very loving with her family. Her legacy will continue on for many generations. What a witness we have in our children. Never take a moment for granted. The same week we got word that my brother and his wife welcomed their first son. He was born healthy and vibrant. It's exciting to finally be an aunt.
Then we stayed at Andrew's parents at the end of April for the annual church conference. We go every year, but this year was special. Andrew received his Lifetime Ordination. It was a very special occasion for us. Andrew has waited a long time for this and we were so excited as his family to celebrate this with him. Immediately following we had lots of family gather at our house for Rhys' dedication. My dad performed the ceremony and even preached! That was nice, I got to sit with my husband. My best friend and her husband were also able to make it out for the weekend, along with Andrew's and my parents. We had lots of fun having that much family out.
Summer consisted of the basics, gardening, VBS, and meeting new family. We traveled down to Andrew's parents and got together with my brother and sister in law. We got to meet my nephew, who is a cutie!! It was neat to see Rhys and him together. They were blissfully unaware of each other. Ivan definitely has some of the family genes in him, as he is built like his father. Rhys resembles his father, so we had two very cute, but so different babies. It always amazes me the difference in babies. We celebrated Nadia's fourth birthday in August, which is hard to believe. Then mid month we made a trip for meetings that Andrew was a part of. I got to spend some quality time with an old friend from our old home town, we had tons of fun I'm sure we'll never forget.
The beginning of September saw us flying to New Mexico for vacation at my parents house. It was a quiet trip, we took one day to sight see, which was nice, but over all it was spent just lazing around at their house. Andrew got to preach at Dad's church, with an interpreter! That was an experience. It was a wonderful time of visiting that ended all too soon. The kids did well on the flights and enjoyed the whole experience. We celebrated Rhys' first birthday at the end of September, followed by Andrew's birthday.
Then, just for the record, we had snow. Measurable snow in mid-October. I can't remember the last time it snowed in October. It was gone within a day or two, but still, we had snow.
The end of the year picked up in it's momentum as we began to look forward to Andrew's first baptismal service mid-November, along with my 30th birthday (feel old?). Thanksgiving was at our house with both sets of parents blessing us with a visit at that time. It was good. I think the food was pretty good too! And, of course, it continues to pick up till Christmas at which point we are anticipating flying out for Andrew's younger brothers wedding. We are excited to welcome a new member to the family and to spend time with family. As I get older, more than shiny packages, it is time spent with family that is a gift. We are looking forward to it.
Andrew continues to grow spiritually as the leader of our household and the church. I see the Lord speaking through him daily to our family and weekly behind the pulpit. He has had a pet project since coming here, the baptismal. It hasn't worked for years for various reasons. And finally, he was able to figure things out and get it fixed. Excited does not begin to describe his emotions about completing this. That made the baptismal service so much more of a celebration for him.
Nadia continues to grow and challenge us with her wit and thought processes. She goes twice a week to preschool, which she loves. She enjoys playing with scrap dough and flour, or scrap fabric tying it all over the house. She enjoys 'rinsing' the dishes, which will keep her busy for hours. She can already write her own name and identify many letters. She is so smart, which is a blessing and also a bane. We are eager to see just what she chooses as a life profession. At this point she says she wants to be a mama. She'll be an intelligent one.
Rhys continues to grow like a bad weed. He understands what we are saying to him very well. He can say “bye bye” and wave, “Papa”, and (if he's stressed) “mama”. He's walking most of the time now, which is so cute. And if we let him (or if he gets away with it), he can crawl up the entire stairs up from the basement. He's got 6 teeth now and we are waiting for more, it's been a while. I can't believe how fast they grow.
I've been doing all my usual ventures. I've taken up quilting and am currently working on a quilt for Andrew and I. I've made several for the kids and decided it was time for a larger, more intricate quilt for us. I am eager to see how it turns out. I am enjoying it and as a consequence have several more quilts on a list to work on. I can't wait. I'm still making bread and gardening. I tried my hand at dried beans this year and beets. Both were very easy and I think I'll be doing them again next year. I also had a yard sale this year, my first. Those are a lot of work! I don't think I'll be doing one again soon. We did well, but I think I'll wait till the kids are a bit older. Goodwill is a good cause.
We had a full but blessed year. We pray the same for you. We hope that this letter finds you well and in the center of God's will for your life. And this year at Christmastime we pray that the true meaning of Christmas finds its way to your hearts and that you would be blessed.


Blessings and Love!

Videos!

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(I secretly love posting videos on my blog, it's an easy way to update without writing much. Now that you know my secret, I know yours too! :)

Perspectives
So good, so true.  

Oh, The Temptation 
Aren't we like this?  I want to try this with Nadia. 

Christmas Competition

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I had friends in school who's parents did not play the whole Santa Claus thing. They forbade any sort of Santa involvement in their Christmas celebrations whatsoever. I used to think they were weird. I couldn't see the harm in it.

Not anymore.

Our community had a tree lighting celebration this past week. We sang some traditional Christmas songs, lit the tree and then the big thing came, Santa. Let me tell you, it was like the parting of the Red Sea. Much like the triumphal entry he came, throwing candy, the kids were screaming and clamoring to see him. Many had already descended upon the building, waiting in line, to where he would finally sit and take children upon his knee. I wanted to cry. 

I wonder if sometimes Jesus cries at Christmas. Does God hurt at how Christmas has become a day honoring a fallen man, when His and His sons sacrifice is forgotten? For the first time I think I understand why my friends parents forbid Santa from Christmas. Because it takes away from the true meaning of Christmas!!

Hubby said, before we had kids, that our children would be taught the truth about Santa. And we have taught them. He says that typically when children are told that Santa does not exist they also believe the same about God. If their parents lied to them about Santa, what's to say they aren't lying about God? So we told Nadia there was a man, a good man, St. Nicholas, who gave gifts to children, but he is dead. Jesus, who was born at Christmas, is not dead. It's funny, though, when people ask her if Santa is coming to our house, she responds "SANTA IS DEAD!" Oh my. The old ladies want to fall over.

Some say it's just about the magic. I'm sorry, let's look at the birth of Christ, and see if we can see something better than magic, Miracles:

• God coming to earth and inhabiting a human body
• A baby concieved in a virgin womb
• the many visits of an angel to Joseph for warnings
• The star that led wise men over hundreds of miles to greet the new king
• The myriad of Angels heralding his birth
• the sheer fact that we can be saved from our sins

Oh yeah, we don't need Santa for magic at Christmas, there are enough supernatural happenings in Christs birth alone. 

The homage paid to Santa disgusts and angers me.  I will not lead my children astray for momentary happiness, when their eternal salvation is more important. 

I am reminded that even though many pay too much attention to Santa,

9 Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven and on earth and under the earth, 11 and every tongue confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.  Philippians 2:9-11

Imagine what the world would be like if we truly treated Christ like the King He is.  Some day we all will. 

Am I weird?  I guess.  Hubby says it's a heart issue and I agree.  Search your heart, see what the Lord tells you. 

Bird Brain

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I'm a bird. Not just any bird. I am an ostrich. And when it comes to End Times I take an ostrich's stance to the whole thing. I bury my head when the whole topic of conversation comes up. I'm scared. To. Pieces. So many people, when they do like to talk about it, like to debate it. They like to say that their interpretation is the way it's going to happen. All that ever did for me was scare me. So I didn't want to think about it. They would prophesy that many who claimed Jesus, would fall away. That would leave me thinking "am I one of those? What if I can't hold on? What if I fall away?" I had no answers and reading Revelations just made me all the more fearful.

Till today.

The Lord speaks to me in many ways. Often it is through my husband. And often it is through him in the pulpit. I have always enjoyed hearing my husband preach, even before he was my husband, or boyfriend. That's a good thing, since I'll be hearing him preach for many years, I hope.

Andrew's Christmas series this year is on the second coming of Christ. When he told me that a while back, it evoked fear in me. I thought, oh boy, here we go. But I trust the Lord. The one thing that God has taught me through the demeanor of my husband is that if my husband is this gentle at teaching me, then so is the Lord. I can trust the Lord to be a gentleman. I should not have been afraid.

Andrew spoke of the Rapture, a popular concept among many, including myself, until a few years ago. I had heard the 'radical' idea that the Rapture wouldn't happen until the end of the tribulation, that the church would indeed endure such hardship. I didn't want to think about it. (This is not to debate that at all, there is a point here beyond that.) But through Andrew's sermon I learned that debating when the Rapture is to happen is missing the point. The point is, we need to be prepared for the event that it does not happen at the beginning. How horrible it would be if we are wrong and not prepared! I would rather believe that it would happen at the end of the tribulation and be wrong, than vice versa. Scripture clearly states that a symptom of an effect Christian is persecution. How can I believe that for some reason now we would be exempt from persecution when the church for centuries has not? What makes the church of today so special? Persecution is coming. I would be foolish to ignore it any longer. This scares me.

9 “Then they will deliver you up to tribulation and kill you, and you will be hated by all nations for My name’s sake. 10 And then many will be offended, will betray one another, and will hate one another. 11 Then many false prophets will rise up and deceive many. 12 And because lawlessness will abound, the love of many will grow cold. 13 But he who endures to the end shall be saved. 14 And this gospel of the kingdom will be preached in all the world as a witness to all the nations, and then the end will come.  Matthew 24:9-14

There is great fear and great comfort in this scripture.  I learned two things that have caused me to breathe a great sigh of relief in this whole End Times thought process.

1. What to do about the persecution that is coming?  Be prepared.  Pretty simple.  I can do that.  How do I be prepared?  See #2
2. Hold on to Jesus.  Also very simple.  

If I keep Jesus at the forefront of my vision in everything it will become second nature.  I need to start now, everyday, every morning, so that I am strong in my bond with Him.  So that when the persecutions do come, I won't be struggling, grasping for something I know nothing about.  It will be so natural, it will be difficult to fall away. 

Hold on to Jesus, that's all I need do.  I can do that.  With Christ's strength, I can do that. 

Sewing Sewing Sewing!!!

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I promised myself I wasn't making any Christmas gifts this year, as I was working furiously on Andrew and I's new quilt.  Welllll, promises, promises.  Nadia's robe was getting seriously short.  I had to make her a new one.  Since I had made one for myself and had a pattern and fabric for one for her, I just thought I'd bang it out.  Well I did and here it is!

It goes to her ankles, which is good, because she likes to put it on right after bath.  The sleeves were too long, but I folded them up so that when she grows I can let them out.  Do you like the nice little button embellishments on the pockets?  She picked them out.  I think it makes it look cute!

Just thought I'd interject some pics of my kids because they are so darn cute! 

Here is the quilt I am working on for Andrew and I.  Here is Andrew modeling said quilt.  I have two more rows to put on, then I'll be able to quilt it up!  I am planning on tying it.  I think that will go the best with this sort of scrappy country quilt. 

Now for those of you who are not of this sort (ie - men) please stop reading.  Don't say you weren't warned. 

I have made my own feminine care.  The colorful pad on the right is actually a pantiliner.  It has three flannel layers on top, a layer of pul and then a final layer of flannel.  I keep the wings attached with a small safety pin.  I've made 8.  Works great.  The other two are for my actual cycle.  The grey/white flannel is a base.  I made four of them, because I use a Diva.  I mostly need backup.  The base itself is a layer of flannel, pul and another layer of flannel.  The white part you see is leftover diaper.  I had used a few of Rhys' newborn cloth diapers, cut out the middle to use as a doubler and saved the sides.  I stitched around the edges and made a great insert.  I also designed said system to be able to put a pantiliner underneath the removable pad for the really heavy days.  That way I don't have to change the base as often (I don't have to make as many).  I've been using the pantiliners and they work great.  I'll let you know how the pads work.  So far they wash up nicely and dry overnight.  I can put them in the dryer, but I want to prolong the life of them, so I don't. 

Here is where I got the idea for the pads/pantiliners. (Two separate links there.)

This is where I bought the pul from.  She has seconds and ends.  You can get a really great price on the stuff and I bought too much, but it doesn't go bad, so I figure I can just keep it and replenish my supply as needed.  Now that I know how. 

So that's what I've been up to.  I'm planning on making a nightgown, a pair of pants and finishing a skirt from two years ago.  But, yeah, I can do that. 

Exercise Regimen

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I thought I'd update on the exercise program I've been doing. It seems for a while that I was just waffling from this and that, doing one thing for a day or two and then switching. I was bored. My results were plateauing and I was frustrated. Well that has changed.

I am currently doing The New Rules for Lifting for Women. I've been doing it since we came back from vacation in early September. At last count I've dropped 9.5 inchess all over. I haven't lost any pounds, but that's ok. That means I'm increasing my lean muscle mass, which eats up more calories than fat in a day. I'm leaning out. Which I like.

With this book comes an eating program (what weight loss book doesn't?). It promotes eating your maintance calories. There is a formula for figuring that out. I could not believe how many calories I was supposed to be eating! But I went with it. I figured I'd give the program a try. And while I haven't lost any pounds from the scale, I also haven't gained any. I know I am loosing fat, as a result of the measurements. So I'm eating more (yay!) and loosing weight. Um, yeah, I think I'll take that!

The first stages are pretty simple and short. I began to think 'is this all there is?'. But then as the stages progress the workouts get longer and more intense. Stage three adds in HIIT (high intensity interval training). It doesn't take a day for me to 'feel' it anymore. And I'm spending about an hour or more down in the basement. The rest time between sets is so long I can get laundry, ironing and even sewing done. I figure if I am down there I should get something else done too.

I do the strength training three days a week, another three I spend doing short cardio, ab work, or stretching. I take one day off a week. When I am done with this book I will continue in this routine but will fashion it for myself. I won't have it be so long. I'm going to have to start getting up earlier to get it done.

So it seems to be working. I enjoy it and it challenges me. I just thought I'd send that along.

Happy Birthday to Moi!

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Yesterday was my birthday!! I'm 30 now! I can finally feel like an adult, whatever. Here are a few pics of my day.

My wonderful hubby and children made me a lovely card.  Andrew took a huge sheet of paper and traced all of their feet on it.  There were 30 toes, a wonderful way to remember turning 30!  And I had requested a washboard for my birthday since there are so many times that I am washing something out by hand, or trying to get a stain out.  I used it today and it's nice!  It's a lot less wear and tear on the clothes for stains, I used to rub the clothing together.  And I get the clothing cleaner when I'm just hand washing.  Andrew got it from the Columbus Washboard Company, I think he got a good price.  It is well made and I love it!

Earlier that day the ladies of my prayer group threw me a mini surprise party, with cake and presents.  I got my homemade cake.  Then in the early evening the family all trekked to the 'city' for Olive Garden.  I was able to get a part for my sewing machine to machine quilt and we also hit Jo-Annes for some needed things for sewing.

All in all it was a very good day.  I made up my mind to have a good day and I did!

Post Pardum Reflections

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I'm brooding tonight. Fair warning, this is not an upbeat post. Hubby is running high tonight, we had our baptism service, this is his first ever and it went well. I'm happy for that. I hate to bring him down, this was such a good day and I enjoyed it. I don't know why I've got such a moody heart tonight. I guess there is just some things that bang around in my mind and sometimes they bang too hard. And it hurts. I need a break. I need to hear the answer to my questions. Andrew and I have been batting an idea back and forth, I know the answer I want, but he is still thinking it out. I need this closed. I need to close this chapter. I need to know I can be done with this.

I've been revisiting some old memories. Trying to let them go. It's brought me down. The whole time after Nadia was born is just a dark and hurtful place. I just pain over this. It's such a surreal time for me. And it seems that things are just popping up all over again. I have a friend who's going through the same thing. Her thoughts, feelings and things she's saying just bring me back. Oh my goodness, I hurt so much over this. I hurt over the loss. I hurt over what wasn't. I hurt over that year. It's gone. Just gone. Most mothers just go back to being themselves after a month or so, they don't live in crippling fear. I would literally be in a panic when she cried. My heart would race when I heard her, it was so hard to even think when I went to her door. I had no idea what to do because of the fear. I lived like that for a year after she was born. I was afraid to be alone. And I was alone, everyday. I was not myself. I was someone else. It seems so stupid to be hurt about fear. It seems so ridiculous to be hurt over this. But I am, that's the truth. I hurt because I was not normal, I was not right. I hurt because I had no joy, no happiness, no love. It pains me to read about women who LOVE their babies. Not because they love their babies, but their love for their babies reminds me I had none for mine. It was not given. I feel cheated. Either myself or God did not give it to me, did not give me that feeling. I'm not blaming God, I'm just saying that whatever gives that love to a mother for her child did not give it to me. I was cheated. That's why I hurt. Why me? Why this sweet little baby girl? What did she do to deserve a mother who didn't love her? Why did I have to suffer through that time, no money to go to a dr, away from family, a church who didn't know, didn't have the capacity to care? Why then, why that way? I feel like I had no way out! Destined to suffer through it.

I read a scripture today in Sunday School, this is all a part of the curse for women. Genesis 3:16 says "To the woman He said: I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception;" WOW! It's like we women are destined for sorrow. A part of the curse. I know there is redemption and hope, but there is still the struggle with it.

You gotta know I am working through this stuff, it's gonna be on here. It's not pretty. But I'm not apologizing for it. This is real and stinky. Just so you know. This is how I heal. I write about it.

I'm A Litfuse Blogger!!

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You'll see the little button thingy over there ------> somewhere. I signed up, via Maggie's Blog, to be a Litfuse review blogger!! I'm so stoked!! You can be one too! Just click on the little bird and it will take you there!! Woohoo!! I can't wait to review my first book.

No Poo Update - "Medicinal" Intervention

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*Sigh* It seems I've encountered a wrench. Something has thrown the proverbial wrench into my no poo workings. I've got dandruff. Big, honkin' flakes. Yuk. It's happened before, about 5 years ago, before Nadia was born. I knew I was prone to it after that, so I was careful, or so I thought. But I was shampooing then, now I'm not. Things are different. I've tried everything I know.
Last time I got this, it wasn't just a few snow flakes, no it was itchies, and pardon me, but like scabby crusted over things on my scalp. It was nasty, and it was painful. I went to the doc. He prescribed something for me, I used it, it did nothing. So I tried Tea Tree Oil. I mixed a few drops into my shampoo and applied. I conditioned as normal and then made sure my scalp and most of my hair was dry. Whatever it was that was causing this grows in a warm, moist environment. It cleared up in no time.
Well now I don't have shampoo to mix it in with. I tried the TTO in the baking soda wash and all it did was make my hair oily. I tried a chamomile, rosemary tea rinse. All that did was burn my hand. Don't ask. Oh, I'm sure it calmed it a bit, but it still didn't do the trick. So then I took straight TTO and applied it directly to my scalp. That did help, but I smelled, oh I smelled so strongly of TTO. If garlic doesn't work to keep Vampires away, TTO sure will! Luckily hubby uses it if he has skin issues, so it didn't bother him.
So, I'm going to have to use something else. I see this as an intervention. One doesn't use antibiotics all the time, just when one needs them. So I'm using castile soap, with a few drops of TTO and Rosemary. I have a huge bottle of it, it doesn't have all the chemicals in it, just natural stuff. I basically need a carrier to get the TTO onto my scalp to work. I figure once a week should do it for a bit. Then I'll go back to just a bit of baking soda to wash like once a week. I think what started this was my scalp got too dry. I didn't need to wash near as often as in the summer. I tend to have drier skin anyway. And I wasn't making sure my scalp was dry at all times. It was staying wet after washings, like at night. Oh so bad. I am hoping this will help. I hope.
But other than that my hair continues to look great. It's shiny, bouncy and just beautiful. I'm wondering if all the other rinses are helping my hair, even if they aren't helping my scalp. I'll have to remember the chamomile rinse. It was nice for refreshing my hair.
I'll let you know how it goes.

Prayers Please

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Would you all mind praying for a dear friend of mine? I'm not divulging any details, except to say that your prayers are valued. Please pray. Thanks.

This Is So Me!

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I once took a personality trait test and it came back Melancholy. I never really took much to it, but I've looked it up and WOW is this me! I thought you might like to read it, if you want to know more about me. It helps to know what I tend towards. Obtained from here. I'm sure they have others, but it is church based, so it's not all secular reading.  Type in bold is like 'yes that is SO me". 

The Melancholy Personality Type

Personality Strengths of the Melancholy

Deep and thoughtful
Analytical
Serious and purposeful
Genius prone
Talented and creative
Artistic or musical
Appreciative of beauty
Sensitive to others
Self-sacrificing
Conscientious
Idealistic
As a parent, sets high standards and wants everything done right.
As a homemaker, keeps everything in order.
As an employee, schedule oriented and hard working.
A list maker and keeper.  (you have no idea)


Personality Weaknesses of the Meloncholy

Easily offended
Can get too caught up in details
Doesn't do well with change.
Struggles with insecurity
Tends towards depression

(I'll keep the "weakness" list short because the Melancholy may tend to dwell on the negatives.)

Of all the personality types, the Melancholy probably struggles the most with a low self image because they have set such high standards for themselves and others.

I love Melancholy people! They are the most organized people I know. My office at church is torn apart every Sunday. People look for things, take things and do not put them back, leave items on my desk and on the counter, leave drawars hanging open, you name it. Don't worry though, my Monday office assistant is a Melancholy.

Upon arrival, she shakes her head with affectionate disapproval and puts everything back in order in no time.

Before you start to wish that you had a Melancholy of your own, don't make the mistake of thinking that they are all this easy going. As a matter of fact, the very same Meloncholy would have a completely different reaction if the room in question were her own kitchen.

I live with another Melancholy. In the time that we have been sharing a house she has managed to rearrange my bathroom and my kitchen and made several not so delicate suggestions about my many "junk" drawers.

As aggravating as Melancholy behavior can be to a Choleric like myself, I have learned to love and appreciate their perfectionism. If I turn a task over to a Melancholy it will be completed neatly and as close to perfect as possible. They make the best proof readers, the best typists and the best bean counters.

Words count with a Melancholy. Every word that comes their way will be replayed in their mind and analyzed for meaning. Their feelings are easily hurt. They have to work hard to keep from falling into a spirit of offense. It helps the Melancholy to stop and ask "did they mean to hurt my feelings?" or "could I be reading too much into what they said?" It also helps to simply echo back comments that are potentially hurtful and make sure that you haven't interpreted them wrong.

Those who have Melocholy people close to them should drop generalizations from their vocabulary. Words like "always" and "never" will not be appreciated. If at all possible, drop the volume of your voice and keep your tone friendly. If you are in a bad mood, take care that you do not drip your negativity on them, they will take it personal and be wondering all day what they did wrong.

A Melancholy can become easily isolated. It's a good thing to keep in touch and give them a lot of positive feedback and personal affirmation.

Melancholy's think all the time. When they get quiet, watch out... Don't be afraid to ask them if everything is alright. Depending on where they are on the road to spiritual maturity, they may not tell you what is really wrong, but be persistent. If you get the feeling that they have been offended by something that you said, just say so. "Did I hurt you when I said..."

Phlegmatic and Sanguine people do not usually have too many problems getting along with the Melancholy. But the Choleric can be a bit rough on them, so they will have to try to tone it down and develop their sensitivity.

The Melancholy is usually an amazing exorter. When they do give you complements, they mean it. They are also often prayer warriors when they turn their thoughts into prayers for the people around them. They are merciful and sensitive to others, making great confidants and counselors.

Who is the most famous Melancholy in the cartoon world? That's easy! It's Eeyore! (Winnie the Poo's slow taking, self deprecating friend!)